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　　1. 用词不当

　　原：The absence of groupwork is a disaster for teenagers in modern society。

　　改：The absence of teamwork is a disaster for teenagers in modern society。

　　评：groupwork是“分组”或许“小组团体使命”的意思。这位同学原本想说teamwork“团队协作”，却用了一个看起来很像，但实践彻底不一样的词，表达出来的意思就风马牛不相及了。

　　原：You will be dangerous if you keep moving without a clear view of the whole picture。

　　改：You will be in danger if you keep moving without a clear view of the whole picture。

　　评：dangerous表明所润饰的对象是“带来风险的，有风险性的”，而be in danger才是“身处险境”的意思。究竟谁才是要挟呢?

　　原：Firstly, the job, providing the opportunity for students to utilize what they learned in class, might effect their further development。

　　改：Firstly, the job, providing the opportunity for students to utilize what they learned in class, might affect their further development。

　　评：容貌长得像，意思可不一样了。这儿想用动词affect表明“影响”，却误写为名词effect“作用”，一字千里啊!

　　2. 调配过错

　　原：Nowadays, people are crazy pursuing to be excellent。

　　改：Nowadays, people are crazy about excellence。

　　评：这位同学显然记错了be crazy about sth. 这个用法，写出来的语句自然会出疑问啦。

　　原：Besides, public speech can effectively increase your communication skills, which facilitate your salesman career。

　　改：Besides, public speech can effectively improve your communication skills, which facilitate your salesman career。

　　评：此处是一个显着的动宾调配过错。“提高……窍门”应当是improve the skills，而不是increase the skills。

　　3.词性错位

　　原：I will forget my sad and pressure from the work and the study。

　　改：I will forget my sadness and pressure from work and study。

　　评：sad是形容词，而这儿显着需求一个名词，应当是sadness。

　　原：Although making money is a priority for most people, spending time with the family is equal significant。

　　改：…, spending time with the family is equally significant。

　　评：形容词significant前需求用副词来润饰，所以equal应当改成equally。

　　4. 时态紊乱

　　原：Although I have no work experience when I was a teenager, I always dreamed about having a job。

　　改：Although I had no work experience when I was a teenager, I always dreamed about having a job。

　　评：过去时的语句中冒出了现在时，同学你太大意了，要仔细检查哦~

　　原：I would explain my view in the following paragraphs。

　　改：I’d like to explain… / I will explain…

　　评：可能是两种说法记混了吧，成果把时态搞错了……

　　5. 主谓不一致

　　原：The way we deal with the environmental problems are crucial to the prosperity of human-being。

　　改：The way we deal with the environmental problems is crucial to the prosperity of human-being。

　　评：谓语之前有两个名词时，主谓调配的疑问就常常呈现了。这儿真实的主语应当是奇数名词the way，所以与之调配的谓语也应当是奇数的is。

　　6. 重复负担

　　原：From my point of view, I think this argument is quite limited since many other ways can also help learning a foreign country。

　　改：From my point of view, this argument is quite limited since many other ways can also help us learn a foreign country。

　　评：from my point of view和I think重复啦，保存一个就好。当然这儿主张留下更“高档”的from my point of view。

　　原：There are the majority of people who deem that they like to spend money on things which can bring them long memory。

　　改：Majority of the people like to spend money on things that can be memorized for long。

　　评：中文句式说的“有很多人……”，但别一看到“有”就非要用there be句型不行哦，直接摆出主谓宾就行了。

　　“things that can be memorized for long”，被动语态显着更地道~

　　7. 中式英语

　　原：Thus, one is easier to draw bosses’ attention and gain appreciation。

　　改：Thus, it’s easier for you to draw bosses’ attention and gain appreciation。

　　评：中文习气说“大家能够更容易地招引老板的注意力”，而英语则习气说“It’s easier for sb. to…”同学们要注意中英表述习气的区别哦!

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